Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Regular drive-by

weekly post. Once this show goes up, I hope to be more regular, and I hope to post more as well (insert rimshot).

So I'm about to go meet some dude from craigslist because I'm finally purchasing an inexpensive Office XP so I don't have to mess with this Open Office software anymore (thank you Open Office, but no one can open my attachments).

My pile of billing grows, as does my belly as I haven't been able to work out in 2 weeks. And I just now, this very minute realized that my moods have been much more moody since the exercise decline. I just had a cancellation Thursday at the club though, so elliptical machine, here I come, and I'm gonna kick your ass.

Did the tax return, finally got it down to where we only owed $90, but I sent it online, to be looked over by some tax professionals, and it seems there are audit flags and errors. Le Shit! No time to figure it out now though, perhaps this weekend.

Lines have to be memorized by this weekend. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!! Ok, so it's not THAT bad, but damnit, I'm kinda freaking about this. There is just no time. I'm sure I have more memorized than I think I do, but still...it's hard teacher.

I am however, scheduled to get 3 hours of massage today, and 3 hours on Thursday. It's technique evaluation time again at the school. These are tech 4's, which means it the last one, and the students are at their best. BoofrigginYA, I say! My back, and neck need it, and my body always supplies the students with endless amounts of pathologies and fun.

Ok, that's all, for now. Loves!

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Thank you universe

for the 2 insurance checks, and 6 copay checks I received the very next day after posting my last post. Thank you for the new insurance client I received with burns over half of his upper body that served to give me a whole lot of perspective about life, and remind me of the real reason I do bodywork. I was very humbled to be able to put my hands on his skin and feel gross muscle mass lost, see scar tissue encroaching onto his face, feel the tautness of the scar tissue pull at his skeleton, and realize that if only for a moment, if I can give him one ounce of freedom of movement, relaxation, a clearer sense of what is going on in his body, freedom from his migraines, I will have done my job. Thank you for sending me this perspective, and the reminder that money, is secondary.

Thank you also for the amazing Buddhist meeting last night, where we discussed how the practice has helped someone overcome and manage bipolar disorder, where we talked about the connection between Buddhism and science, where we heard about a multi-millionaire Japanese man who worked in, and cleaned a bathroom in Japan because he wanted to meet, and take care of American members that came to visit the SGI there.

Thank you for the wonderful women I am doing my current show with, who are making this process, considering the topic of the piece, cake. Thank you for the learning that is coming my way in regards to this show.

Thank you for my family, who is going through some very tough times right now with mental health, issues with the safety of my nieces and nephews, emotional and physical exhaustion, and working out their own lives.

Thank you for my husband, without whom, I would be so much less fulfilled, challenged, entertained, and most definitely fucked like a demon.

Thank you for my blogger friends, who despite not being able to keep up with their lives as frequently any more, I think about every day, and wish them all the fulfillment in the world.

Thank you for the opportunity to listen to friends and family members who are in need. Every time I talk to them, I learn something about myself.

Thank you universe, thank you.

Friday, March 17, 2006

L Word Meme

Which Character from The L Word are You???

you are SHANE! the heartthrob of the group, you're with a new catch every time you go out. you've got the whole 'sexy' thing down and use it to get whatever you want, whenever you want it!
Take this quiz!

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Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Money can kiss my ass

Vent-age ahead, don't read if you don't want to hear me go off...

I'm at a loss. I have only gotten paid for 4 massages since 2/6/06 when I went back to work. Our parents are tapped, about $1200 in bills coming due in the next two weeks. I have ABSOLUTELY no idea where any money is coming from. I am so tired of red-tape bureaucracy, and all the requisite bullshit paperwork involved. And you know what, the big rich companies still win out. Between the insurance companies, the drug companies, the oil companies, this country is going down the shitter. There is only so much time in the day to stay on insurance company's assess between doing massage, rehearsal (I really should have thought twice about the timing of this show), and being self-employed and running a business.

I'm trying to be strong, trying to stay positive and keep things moving in a forward direction, but sometimes, some days, you just want to sit down in a corner, tell the world to fuck off, and cry for 3 days.

The show is good, I like the ladies I'm working with, I still have some trouble with the script - which in some parts, reads like a self-help book on pedophilia/incest/power issues. I think the actresses involved will make it work though(they are all pretty kick ass), I love the director, and think that she is very talented at creating very wonderful images on stage. It will be interesting, at the very least.

Please universe, please send me the money I've made so Ly and I can pay our bills and eat. Please universe, send me my period early so I also don't have to be a raging hormonal succubus while trying to sort all this shit out.

Anybody have any good rice and bean recipes? Lentils? Anyone? Anyone? Cheap and easy, cheap and easy, just like me.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

A little Stine popourri...

Random tidbits from my life lately...

1. Went over to my lovely friend K's house on Sunday night. She has TiVo, and invited me to come watch the Sopranos. We had some baked goods, then some wine, then some other kind of goods, and then watched the Sopranos. Which holy God, if you haven't seen...get thee to cable. We then, both being reality tv whores, watched Extreme Makeover Home Edition. She put a box of tissue between us, and we cried, we snotted(well I can only be sure I snotted), and laughed for the next hour. It was brilliant. Thanks for a lovely evening K.

2. The other day, my husband actually said to me (and again I paraphrase), "you know this morning, I had this really calm sense of well-being that lasted for awhile."

I shit you not.


By the love of God, if they kill Tony...I'm gonna loose it. Last night's ep was gud!

4. On Saturday night, I got a stack of billing done 10 envelopes deep. When you're doing things by hand, that's a lot.

5. I need a massage more than God right now. I have the kind of back and shoulders that I would yell at someone for. This next Monday, my friend S is giving me one. Must wait until Monday...MUST wait until Monday....AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Little sidenote about Stine (if you haven't already intuited it) the two things that make me go CRAZY if I don't get on a regular basis is....anyone.....anyone....????

Massage & Sex

And on that note, I take my leave

Monday, March 13, 2006

For now...

Who would've thunk it?

You scored as Buddhism. Your beliefs most closely resemble those of Buddhism. Do more research on Buddhism and possibly consider becoming Buddhist, if you are not already.

In Buddhism, there are Four Noble Truths: (1) Life is suffering. (2) All suffering is caused by ignorance of the nature of reality and the craving, attachment, and grasping that result from such ignorance. (3) Suffering can be ended by overcoming ignorance and attachment. (4) The path to the suppression of suffering is the Noble Eightfold Path, which consists of right views, right intention, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right-mindedness, and right contemplation. These eight are usually divided into three categories that base the Buddhist faith: morality, wisdom, and samadhi, or concentration. In Buddhism, there is no hierarchy, nor caste system; the Buddha taught that one's spiritual worth is not based on birth.



















Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
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Saturday, March 04, 2006

PS - Blogrolling

I did the blogrolling thing, and it's not working. How do you make it stick, so that it actually tells you when there are new posts on someone's blog?

Random quick thoughts

I am currently buried under a pile of billing paperwork nearing a mile high. This is good on the money front. This is bad on my hands. I need a secretary. Anybody willing to trade massage for secretary work? I'm actually kind of serious.

Anyway, needless to say business has TOTALLY picked up. I just need to find a better solution to process all the damn paperwork. I am also currently trying to find a post-surgery baseline for my body. I'm still feeling out how many massages I can do a day, and in a week. I did almost 20 hours last week, and I will have done about 18 by the end of this week. 16 is considered full-time. I had a bit of a breakdown yesterday about my schedule and how my body is/isn't holding up. Dr. E adjusted me though, and gave me a kick-ass pep talk, and I despite being exhausted, I feel a bit better today.

Ly started his rehearsals this past week. My rehearsals are going to start in two weeks. I haven't had the work 2 jobs and go to rehearsal schedule in many moons. It will be nice to be on stage again though.

Speaking of actors, Ly and I saw 8 of the cutest, best, and most cuddly actors in the world last night. We saw 8 Below last night. I swear to God, these dogs were GREAT actors. The nuances those doggies showed in their faces rival anything done by any of the best actor nominees this year. It was a nice catharsis after the day I had yesterday.

As far as my last post, I have still been working on an editorial letter to the major news papers. I am going to post it, as soon as I get enough time to actually work on it. I want to get feedback, additions, changes, editing ideas from anyone willing to give them. I am having a hard time giving the back story, without the letter getting too long. In a nutshell, big hospital gives me care, I have huge bill, they won't accept the amount of money I can pay them each month. Six months ago they sent me to collections for $87.00 that had still not been paid from an old bill (I had been continually making payments). So now that's on my credit report (which Ly and I worked hella hard to make it good). We pay all our bills each month, we just have TONS of them. That's why our credit is/was good, until those bastards sent us to collections. And now, after my surgery, with a much larger balance than before, they are unwilling to accept what I can pay, and want me to pay more each month. I have told them that I have no assets, no car, no house, and that they can't get blood from a stone. I have never NOT paid these people, I just apparently have not paid them what they want each month. The guy in patient account services actually had the audacity to tell me that they aren't a lending institution, and that they are just trying to make ends meet, and keep the lights on.
What in the SAM FUCK is that supposed to mean? Oh you poor multi-million dollar corporation that receives funding, and donations from all over the state. Cry me a fucking river already. So needless to say, I think I have decided to (even if it means Ly and I don't have enough money for other bills) to pay them what they want each month, write my story down, and send it to the papers anyway. I mean this is the hospital that paralyzed my vocal cord and permanently changed my theatrical life. I should have sued their fucking asses off when I had the chance. So anyway, this is why I need to seek legal advice. I need to find out if I have any options of telling them to go fuck themselves. I will still pay the bill, I'm just tired of being called 3 or 4 times a month, harrassed, and treated like some low-life that is dripping heroin from her veins, and not paying her bills.

So that's the story in a nutshell. Anyway, I truly apologize for not being the best blog friend that I can, I'm just swamped out of my mind. I hope you are all well, and I hope to find some time to catch up soon.